The Shadow Monster

The shadow monster is back.

I have come to the conclusion that I can never do away with this old friend. Over the last couple of months I have successfully been able to tuck him quite nicely just like sun dried laundry on a Saturday afternoon paying no regards to his rough edges .

I remember how I first came across this unwanted friend. You see growing up kids had imaginary friends. At no older than 5 years old, the shadow monster was certainly not that. Present through out stages of my life, his existence has always been real. It was through a song that he manifested himself to me and just like the African war songs, it drew him out into existence, out of hes connives within my mind. This song was unlike all other songs I had gotten accustomed to at the time. It was a well practiced performance of my life acted out by the very people who where supposed to love me unconditionally. And I had front row seats to every show.

You can understand how I could have easily mistaken the shadow monster as a friend. He gave me the space I badly desired to agonize in myself deeper. Today I know the shadow monster is no friend of mine and although I am aware that I can not totally get rid of him, I am determined however to win back my ground in this on going battle with the shadow monster. I have new friends now and with their help I am able to confine the shadow monster whenever he pokes out his unwanted head to play. The shadow monster came out to play today but I told him I had other plans.